Welcome to 2023- Why LoudSilences?

Welcome to 2023! I hope you are off to a great start of the new year. In loudsilences.org, we are excited.

On February 18, 2023, LoudSilences is going to be THREE years old! Yes, you heard that right. The very first post went out on this day in 2020- Welcome to LoudSilences- Turn it Up!

So I thought it is best to kick off the year by reiterating the vision and goals for LoudSilences. LoudSilences was birthed at a point where I had come out of a LOW moment in my life. As I looked back, I realized that it was VERY HARD to open up- I had struggles with mental health, addiction issues I thought were dealt with reared their ugly heads again.

But in all of these, I did not want to open up. And I was told “why did you not open up, how are people supposed to help you?” I pondered on this question and these were the answers:

  • There is a culture of silence people are expected to be hush-hush about ‘taboo topics’ (e.g. my father molested me- how do you tell people that?)
  • We have held on to customs and traditions that have fuelled these cultures of silence within families, churches, workplaces, schools and that has to change.
  • The idea ‘no one will understand’ is not unfounded, however not true. There were people who genuinely cared and it was unfair to have shut them out
  • Even when people do care and you can SPEAK UP to them, they sometimes cannot help you. This is mostly due to lack of knowledge. Said knowledge can be obtained if someone taught them.
  • The enemy thrives in silence- being silent about your issues keep them in the dark. To fight darkness, turn on light. Sharing the issues with a trusted person is shinning light. Many people drown because they are silent.
  • We all need to get comfortable talking about uncomfortable topics

As a result of answering these questions, LoudSilences was birthed. The silence had become so loud, it is now defeaning. And we hear it in the number of divorces, suicidal events, rising mental health issues and so on. The silence was loud then, it seems to be even louder now. This means that LoudSilences is valid today as it was three years ago.

But we could not have existed without you- our dear readers, survivors and advocates. Over the last years, I have had the privilege to hold conversations with people who have been raped, molested, abused, harassed, struggling with addiction, etc.

LoudSilences exists to bridge knowledge and awareness gaps on these topics. It exists to get us all comfortable in having these conversations- exists as a safe space for survivors to bear their hearts out and find their voice. I am grateful to those who have allowed their mindsets to be challenged and renewed.


Towards the end of last year, we had started a ‘Dear Anita’ series- this was informed by stories people are sharing with us. It has been a privilege hearing these stories. Some are heart-breaking, challenges us. Yet, others are inspiring and as we get permission we will continue to share these with you.

In this year, we are looking to some exciting goals for LoudSilences, and as we hit these milestones, we will continue to keep you in the loop. We are looking forward to an amazing year and we hope that you are too in your personal lives. Here’s to an amazing 2023. Nothing shall limit us by God’s grace!

Anita Adefuye





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